Modern Day Jewish

Today is Rosh Hashanah - the Jewish New Year - and we're supposed to go out of town to celebrate with my relatives for dinner.  The problem is that it's pouring rain right now and there's thunder clapping, too.  Do I want to sit on the 401 for two hours driving to attend a dinner that may only last two or three hours? The kids will be exhausted as will Jay and I. 

On the other hand, we don't get to truly celebrate the Jewish holidays very often as my parents and brother live out of town as do some of my other relatives. It's tricky - we want to expose our children to all cultures and religions in our family - Jewish, Baptist, Christian, Japanese, Canadian, Scottish, Hungarian, Russian - but the holidays always seem to include the stress of planning or cooking or buying or traveling.  I love celebrating, focusing on my cultural background and seeing my family but in a way it's just another thing to add to our already long list of things to do.  I'll let you know how we make out tonight but, in the interim, I'll wish our Jewish readers a very Happy New Year!

That's Amore, Montessori

Catherine Mahoney is a teacher and mother of four (that's right - four) children. She owns Little Acorns Montessori School in mid-town Toronto. Because my kids have enjoyed a Montessori education (along with traditional public school) and because I received questions from some of our ParentsCanada readers on the topic, I wanted to share more on the Montessori philosophy and mandate. Catherine does a great job of explaining its evolution and methods here.

Q: Where does Montessori originate?

A: The Montessori philosophy was created by the first female physician in Italy. She worked with children who were considered to be unteachable and proved that with the right materials and teaching styles that they were capable of learning.

Q: Why did you decide to go this route in teaching?

A: Around the time I was trying to figure out which road to take, a friend enrolled her son in a Montessori school because he was not enjoying his traditional kindergarten. I saw him when he first enrolled and then about six months later and the change was remarkable. That began my interest in Montessori philosophy.

Q: What does a Montessori-focused education give children that a traditional one does not?

A: A Montessori education allows children to follow their own instincts and interests in areas of learning and allows them to learn at their own pace. It stresses choice and gives children ownership and a sense of independence which translates to greater confidence in their own abilities.

Q: What type of child benefits most from Montessori? Are there any that would not benefit?

A: Almost all children benefit from Montessori education. In a well-prepared environment all children of all abilities can grow and develop. I have only known one family that found the environment unsuitable, and I beleive that he was not socially ready for a group dynamic.

Q: Is it early childhood education only?

A: Montessori was traditionally a program and educational style aimed at children aged 3-6. This is considered the time of the "absorbent mind" when children learn without trying by virtue of the environment that they are placed in. Today Montessori has been expanded to inlcude both elementary and high school programs in a few schools.

Q: Is it useful for children who have physical or mental disabilities?

A: Montessori is helpful for all exceptional children both "gifted" and chilren with "disabilites". The environment is set up so that children are taught respect for themselves and for others and grow at their own pace not at the pace dictated by their age. Montessori classrooms are multi-age community classrooms where chidren 2-5 are generally working side by side.

Q: What's the most interesting thing you've learned as a Montessori teacher over the years (about kids)?

A: The most interesting thing that I have learned is that we constantly underestimate the abilities of the children around us because of their age. They are remarkably aware and capable of far more than we give them credit for.

Q: Is Montessori education usually done through a private school setting and therefore more expensive?

A: Montessori is predominantly a private school setting. Most Montessori Schools are licensed under the ministry of community and social services as a type of "day nursery" and therefore can by considered child care for children under 6. Schools vary widely in terms of tuition based on their size and location. Montessori is not regulated by a Montessori governing body so there are not standard fees.

Q: Do you see a trend in education in Canada where public schools are taking on any particular Montessori-based philosophies or methods?

A: These are already public schools in B.C. that are adopting Montessori classrooms on an experimental basis. Many Ontario classrooms are taking parts of Montessori philosophy and applying it within a larger curriculum. It depends very much on the teacher and how aware they are of Montessori methods.

Q: Please add anything else you feel would help/be useful to our audience.

A: Montessori is a wonderful all-inclusive way to introduce a child to learning for life, but as with all things, taking care is important when choosing a school or program. At present schools are not licensed to operate by a governing Montessori body and therefore one will find huge variances in the philosophy, the materials, and the adherance to Montessori methods from school to school. Parents should not assume that because a school has Montessori in the name, that it is what they are looking for. There are large and small schools that follow minimally the philosophy and there are also both large and small schools that make a huge effort to follow the original teachings as best they can. Parents should try and educate themselves a little before visiting a school so that they make an informed decision.

For more on this topic, check out Your Child's Early Brain Development.  Quite an interesting read!

Good Mother

Last week, my friend S. sent a quick email in regard to my "nanny-gate" blog post. She offered her best wishes to Jay and me and was hoping that things were looking up.  Actually, I have her exact words right here:

"...We were also discussing one of your Blog entries about the nanny situation - holy smokes - what a nightmare.  My hat's off to you - but then again I was always impressed with your parenting skills.  I think you are a great mother."

I was so touched by her words.  Reading the email even made me well-up with tears. Having someone say, "you're a good mother" means so much. Sure, it's always nice to hear, "Your hair is the perfect shade of orangey-red," or "Hey, have you lost weight?" but receiving a compliment on one's parenting skills takes a random remark to a whole new level. 

When I'm deep in the trenches, responding to yet another, "But why, Mommy?" query or scraping fish stick breading off the plates with my fingernails at 9 pm, knowing that someone thinks I am a good parent will be so gratifying. I must pass this sentiment on to other friends, letting them know that they, too, are great mothers and fathers; a "pay-it-forward" if you will. 

Thank you, S.  I'm still so grateful for your kind words.

How Green Are Your Diapers?

I've long been a fan of Seventh Generation diapers and wipes. When I lived near the Danforth (a popular, urban area in Toronto) a few years ago, I'd trek over to the Carrot Common (think crunchy, healthy, organic, green) for a boat-load of these expensive-but-safe diapers for our first-born.  We no longer live near the Danforth, and Seventh Generation diapers are MIA here in semi-suburbia.  But I've learned that their stuff (including feminine hygiene products) will be available at Loblaws stores and other major chains in Canada in the near future.

From what I understand, the concern about standard diapers is not only in the fact that the chemically-bleached, white paper cover touches our babies' skin but that the process -- turning raw pulp and paper into bleached white diapers and the like -- is damaging our trees, our seas, our fish and vegetation. That, of course, affects what we eat and drink and dioxins have also been linked to cancer. This tidbit is from one of the studies I read: "The pulp and paper industry has been responsible for major inputs of persistent organic pollutents (or POPs), particularly dioxins, to the Baltic Sea." (Note: The source is a study posted on a Greenpeace site but I can't get the link to work here.)

Recently, I chatted with Betsy McGinn of Seventh Generation about the company, their products and their move into the mainstream.

Q: Are there studies that prove that issues or illness arise with chlorine and other chemicals in standard diapers?   

A: Martin Wolfe, in Seventh Generation's R&D division says, "The description "Chlorine Free" refers to the use of totally chlorine free (TCF) bleaching technology for the pulp used in Seventh Generation diapers.  TCF technology means that no chlorine, sodium hypochlorite, chlorine dioxide (used in elemental chlorine free, ECF, bleaching), or other derivatives of chlorine are used to bleach to fibres in our diapers or feminine hygiene pads."

Q: What's the number one thing parents should know about regular diapers and how chlorine-free diapers can help?

A: Like any product you would buy for your baby, we ask our consumers to read the ingredient labels.  Conventional diaper manufacturers and conventional cleaning products companies do not disclose their ingredients.  I can not think of too many parents that would feed their babies food that did not disclose ingredients, so it is important to have this level of transparency. There are many components that are important to parents.  Chlorine-free is of greatest concern to parents who use our diapers but also, that we use sustainably harvested wood-pulp for the fluff in our diapers, as well as no dyes or fragrances.

Q: What can you tell me about your feminine hygiene products? Same thing - no chlorine? Better for the environment?

A: Like our diapers, our feminine hygiene products are not bleached.  Also, our tampons are made from organic cotton. According to the Pesticide Action Network, cotton production accounts for more than 10% of the world's pesticides, and is the most insecticide-intensive crop in the world.  So it is an important health benefit to have neither chlorine nor pesticides in products in and on our bodies.

---

Now, I'll come clean and tell you that I've got a case of Huggies upstairs in Lily's room.  We're starting to potty-train our daughter but, after speaking with Betsy and reading up on the issues, I feel like I should run out and buy a case of chlorine-free dipes right now. What are your thoughts: Do you cloth-diaper? A fan of the mainstream brands? Not convinced it's a problem? Thinking of changing brands? I'd love to know. Email me @ lisah AT parentscanada.com or comment here.

Serenity Now

Last weekend, a few of my high school friends got together for a mini reunion.  The group was originally going to bigger and the date longer (a full day and night).  In the end there were four of us and the get-together lasted about six hours but, oh, what a glorious six hours it was!

We met for coffee downtown and then walked to a very expensive magnificent spa. We had booked ourselves in for one group treatment (I wish it had been a whole day of pampering) and also a "spa" lunch.  The lunch was delicious and relaxing (most people ate in their robes!) and we got to catch up with each other. One of our friends was in from LA for a wedding, another drove in from Cambridge,ON, I'm in Toronto (a mere 30-minute subway ride to downtown) and the last drove in from Hamilton. It was so great to chat and relax.  Yes, we talked about our kids and our husbands but we also reminisced about "the good old days" of parties, dances, boys and trips.

The spa offers use of their "water therapies" when you book a treatment so, after lunch, we grabbed our suits and headed to the rather fancy hot tub and steam room.  We continued to catch up, compare notes, ask advice, laugh and vent. What better therapy is there? After an hour, we changed into our robes and headed to another floor for our pedicures.  My toes are now looking quite marvelous and, even though the treatment room was overly crowded fully booked that day, the girls and I were still able to chat.

Sadly, after our pedicures, our day came to a close. We paid for our treatments and lunch and then headed out into a huge rainstorm to go our separate ways.  I'm so looking forward to meeting up with my high school pals again - in fact, we're all planning to go on a group vacation to celebrate our 40th birthdays in a year or two. If that day was any indication, it's going to be more fun than I can possibly imagine.  Thank you, girls; three days later I'm still feeling rejuvenated.

Garlic-breath to the rescue...

Here's more back-to-school help for parents like me who are now wondering: "Ack! What do I pack for my kids' lunches?" And, while I'm at it: "What the heck should I pack for my son's nut-free, non-perishable, no-sugar (all school policy) afternoon snack?" 

Here, to the rescue, is ParentsCanada.com's new Family Nutrition Expert, Lianne Phillipson-Webb. (I know this is a very long post but Lianne provided so much valuable insight and info that I was light on the editing.)

Q: With concerns over various meats being recalled and the no-nut policy in so many daycares and schools across Canada, please suggest nutritious options for kids' lunches and snacks (to be packed and brought out of the home).

A: Lunches can be full of great foods, nutrients and taste!  It’s not always easy to keep the creative juices flowing when making lunch.  Ensure that you are offering both carbohydrates and protein in your child’s packed lunch.  You might get teacher’s positive comments on school work, behaviour and attention span when you get that balance right.  Here’s some help on how make that happen…

• Soup:  Include a variety of vegetables like butternut squash, sweet potato, celery, onions, garlic and sneaky ones such as kale, chard, spinach, and broccoli.   Combined with lentils, barley or rice, you are giving both protein and carbohydrate here.  Use homemade stock if you have any and coconut milk for great flavour and some fat that will keep them going even longer.  Fill up a stainless steel thermos, add some crackers and presto!

• Wraps: Wraps are a great alternative to a sandwich.  Look around for wraps make of kamut, spelt or corn for a great change to white flour wraps.  Fill with grated cheese, sliced chicken or turkey from last night’s dinner, salmon or tuna or falafel and always add some greens.  Finely tear up spinach, arugula or try sunflower sprouts.  Top with some hemp salad dressing and you have a yummy and nutrient packed lunch.

• Leftovers: When shopping for dinner, buy a larger piece of fish or chicken than you will eat for dinner.  Make some purple potatoes and green beans, again more than you need for dinner, and, presto: an instant lunch for the next day.  If you do buy fish and potatoes, you can mash up the leftovers and make into fish cakes, coat with sesame seeds and you have another filling lunch.

• Bean burgers: Make up batches of bean or veggie burgers and put into the freezer.  They are quick to take out of the freezer, offer some mayonnaise or hummus to dip them into and combine with carrot sticks and cucumber slices. 

• Homemade pizza: There are lots of pizza bases that you can buy in stores.  Look out for multigrain-rice flour bases by Organic Oven, or kamut and spelt found in most health food stores.  Use a basil pesto for the base as a tasty change to tomato sauce.  Pile it high with finely chopped vegetables, leftover chicken pieces.  And try goat’s mozzarella for a change to dairy and you will have them asking for more.  You can also make up two pizzas and freeze for another day. 

So, think outside the sandwich.  Although it’s an easy option, there are many more foods out there to feed your budding Einstein with the fuel to keep them going. 

Q: If a child insists on having (or a parent would like to give) a special treat, what's the best "off the shelf" scenario: Cookies? Cake? Pie? Ice cream?

A: If you want to offer something as a ‘treat’ to your child, I might suggest making them aware that the type of treat that they want is not the most nutritious and if a cookie is what they are after, then a piece of fruit is what goes along with it. With that said, if you are going to give cookies, try to find some that are not filled with sugar, white flour and shortening.  Checking the ingredients of whatever you offer, cake, ice cream or pie is really important.  The fewer ingredients on the list, the better and the further away that sugar is from the beginning, the less it contains. 

Q: What's your suggestion for the best post-3 pm snack for school-aged kids?

A: Fruit is always important to include in any snack. Offer it at any opportunity.  At the end of the school day your child may a bit tired, they will get a boost from the fruit’s natural sweetness.  Always try to combine some protein with fruit such as cottage cheese, nuts and seeds such as almonds, walnuts, sunflower and pumpkin seeds.  Dried fruit will give them a faster energy boost and offer great nutrients such as iron too! Remember the super foods such as Goji berries, dried mulberries and golden berries.  They not only offer amazing nutrients, but really fill you up and give a burst of energy.

This is also a great time to offer those foods that they can’t take to school such as almond butter. Try smoothing it into celery sticks, or spread on a healthy carrot muffin, or even mixed into a smoothie including a banana and milk (also a great place to sneak in some spinach or sunflower sprouts and even a bit of protein powder!).  Apple slices smothered in almond butter or just on some banana slices always goes down well too. A more savoury snack is a brown rice cake or cracker, or better yet carrot sticks with a protein rich dip like hummus. 

Q:  If a child is coming down with a cold or cough, is there a great food or drink he can take to ward off illness?

A: Garlic is the number one immune boosting food there is.  It kills bacteria and viruses.  Add garlic to cooking, raw to dips such as hummus, or using a garlic press; add some into a tea of lemon juice and honey.  Vitamin C rich foods are always essential to boost the immune system.  Eat any of the following ; green and red peppers, avocados, banana, kiwi, kale, collards, parsley, broccoli, tomatoes, mango, cantaloupe, strawberries, and citrus fruits.

Post a comment here or email me @ lisah AT parentscanada.com if you've got questions for Lianne or suggestions for your own healthy, happy snacks and meals.  I'd love to hear 'em. Tomorrow I will have a blog post catering to the parent-to-be and the new parent on enviromentally-friendly diapers and wipes.

Sweet Tips on Kidz Teeth

For those of us with school-age kids, the back-to-school routine is now in motion. With so many restrictions put on the food and drink we bring into schools and daycares -- no nuts, no sliced meats (due to recalls), no candy and sugary treats -- I thought it would be wise to do a blog series on nutrition tips and health for the kinder set and their parents.

Here are some facts and tips from the Ontario Dental Association:

FACT: Saliva helps to wash away sugar and acids, inhibiting the growth of bacteria that contribute to tooth decay and gum disease.
TIP: Save sweets for mealtimes rather than between meals, as the amount of saliva produced at mealtimes will help protect your child’s teeth.

FACT: When it comes to your teeth, it’s not about the amount of sweets you eat, but the length of time that you leave your teeth exposed to sweets.
TIP: Choose something with less sugar like cheese, nuts and seeds. Avoid sticky sweets like toffee or hard candy.

FACT: Cutting down on sugary snacks helps prevent bacteria that contribute to tooth decay.
TIP: Pack your child’s lunch with fresh or unsweetened canned fruits and vegetables.

FACT: Acidic food and drinks may contribute to acid erosion. The acid can linger in your mouth, taking the minerals away and softening the surface of your teeth.
TIP: Have your child finish breakfast, lunch or dinner with a little cheese or milk as these products help cut down on acid in the mouth.

FACT: Even though children will lose their baby teeth, it is important to develop good oral habits.  Healthy baby teeth help the permanent teeth come in straight.
TIP: Make an appointment for your child to see the dentist around the age of one, or when the first teeth appear. To prepare for the first visit:

-Take your child along with an older brother, sister or friend when they go for a routine checkup or cleaning
-Let your child bring his or her favourite stuffed toy along
-Treat the appointment as routine

FACT: Hormone levels change considerably during pregnancy. Gingivitis, an early stage of gum disease, may occur any time during the second to eighth month of pregnancy.
TIP:  Tell your dentist if you are pregnant. Your dentist may recommend more frequent professional cleanings during your second or early third trimester to help reduce the chance of developing gingivitis.

I have to admit that Jay and I are not the best about cleaning our kids' teeth more than once per day.  We're got to get in the habit of having the kiddos brush their pearly whites after breakfast and before bed.  Perhaps I'll get the Ontario Dental Association to call me every day as a reminder.  Is that going too far?

Nannyless in T.O.

I've had a few friends ask me on Facebook, in real life and via my ParentsCanada email address about the whole story behind our nanny quitting so suddenly. I guess it's time to spill the beans.

Background: We used the Live-in Caregivers Program through the government to hire and then sponsor a nanny from the Philippines to come work for us in Canada. The whole process took a few months and a whole mess of paperwork to complete.  It was by no means difficult, just time-consuming and somewhat nerve-wracking.

Our nanny, G., arrived here in September of last year. It took quite a while for everyone to get used to the new routine (most notably our son) but G. was sweet and hard-working and my husband and I tried to be friendly and helpful. I introduced her to neighbours and other nannies that I had met in the park and she seemed to be happy and was affectionate and patient with our kids.

With the live-in caregiver program, the employer pays the caregiver a base salary and then half the taxes of their "employee."  The nanny pays the other half. In addition, the employer offers a clean, private spacious room and three meals a day.  I've found that most nannies quickly prefer a live-out situation where they can have more privacy.  Of course, this costs the employer more as then room & board are no longer a factor.

Fast Forward - August 2008: After we returned from Ottawa in August, G. informed me that she had taken on a new job for a new family.  I was pretty shocked but G. assured me that she would still babysit for us in the mornings (9 am to 1 pm) as her other job was to be from 3 pm to 9 pm.  I was a little suspicious for her sake that a new employer was going to take up G's sponsorship and pay her as a live-out nanny for that short amount of time but assumed she was confident about her decision.  Jay and I were disappointed but we accepted it and made peace with the news.

September 2, 2008 - The First Day of School: Kash has a bad dream (school related?) and wakes me up at 5:30 am to inform me of that fact. After some comforting, he goes back to sleep but I decide to get a jump-start on work (we had been away in Wasaga Beach the week prior and I was woefully behind on my freelance projects).  I log on to my various email addresses and start working away. At about 6 am, my email pings and I get a note from G. Strange. I open it and to my complete shock and dismay, it's a short email informing me that she will not be coming in to work AT ALL! The note was quite nasty and very brief.  I quickly wrote her back and left a message on her cell trying to figure out what had happened.  All the while, I'm thinking: "What are we going to do?"  Oh, I forgot to mention an important fact: my husband had the day off and was already out golfing when I received the email!

To make a very long story somewhat shorter, G. did not get hired by this new family (they hired a full-time live-in caregiver instead) and she got confused and panicked. G. is now stuck without a legal sponsorship in the country and no money coming in. After learning this, I wanted to hash everything out and try to re-hire her but upon speaking with Jay and thinking about her actions i.e. giving me THREE HOURS NOTICE on the first day of school! I decided that we should make other arrangements.

Today: Things are going okay but it's a lot more work for both Jay and me.  In addition to childcare, G. helped with light housekeeping and some food prep. However, I was fortunate to get both Lily and Kash into a Montessori program four mornings a week and Kash has SK every afternoon. (Kash has attended this Montessori program on and off for many years and Lily has met the teacher and some of the kids prior to this episode).  I like being able to see my kids more every day but at the same time, the new schedule includes many interruptions in my work-day. For now, we're managing.

Let me know if you've had any nanny "nightmares" or care to sympathize (or not). For more info on childcare options, you can read The Quality Child Care Quest.

Jumping on the Green Bandwagon

Hello loyal ParentTalk Blog readers.  I apologize for the delay in posting.  I was going to write about the sudden and rather upsetting departure of our nanny (she quit and then quit again...) but the whole experience is still raw so I'm going to write about a few new "green" products and services that have recently come to my attention.

While there are a host of reusable and enviro-friendly shopping bags out there, these pretty, waterproof, and foldable Envirosax are a great addition to the mix.  Available to purchase by U.S. and Canadian consumers, Envirosax offers an organic series (made from recyclable materials), a kids' line with cute prints and a grocery shopping series. 

This beautifully-designed and educational 2008-09 calendar is made by 3six5green. It begins in the school year and is illustrated by a 9-year-old girl and her mom on acid-free, unbleached, handmade paper. Wow! Each month features a significant fact about global warming. This would make a wonderful birthday or thank-you gift.

Next week, I'll be speaking with someone at Seventh Generation. This long-time enviro-friendly company produces chlorine-free diapers, wipes, cleaning liquids, feminine products and a host of other useful supplies.  I've been a fan of their lo-tech diapers for some time but have to use polluting gases to drive some distance to purchase their products.  None-the-less, I appreciate their products and their company policies.

Olympus products have little to do with baby, kids or parenting (save for the thousands of pix we all take of our little ones and families) but I agree with this company's stance on environmental conservation. Their site has many pages devoted to their enviro policies and updated earth-friendly packaging, products and policies including minimizing mercury.

Inclusive Snacks

For many Canadian kids, school starts today. In fact, my son is attending his first day of French Immersion as I write this. While school brings new friends and teachers, homework, fresh topics and celebrations, it can also bring anxiety to kids and parents of children who suffer from food allergies. My mother-in-law, nephew and friend's son are all allergic to gluten. Gluten is a protein found in wheat and, along with peanuts, dairy and eggs, is an allergy source for myriad people.

Jill Robbins is a trained clinical psychologist who loved her job but decided to take on a new venture when her son was diagnosed with food allergies. Bradley is now 11 years old and HomeFree Treats (formally Gak's Snacks) is the now booming business that Robbins created. After identifying a need: children with food allergies should be able to enjoy daily snacks and special treats, Robbins is able to combine her desire to provide healthy, organic treats with a hole in the grocery market - people with food allergies. Most of Robbins' business comes from the U.S. where she is based but HomeFree ships their treats and cookbooks to Canada.

Here's a Q&A with Jill Robbins, mother and entrepreneur:

Q: Please tell me about your business.

A: "HomeFree Treats (formally Gak's Snacks) offers baked treats free of peanuts, tree nuts, eggs and dairy, and most people with wheat and soy allergies can enjoy them as well. Our treats are also certified organic, kosher pareve, and whole grain, and contain no cholesterol or trans fat. With our products, people with and without special dietary needs can enjoy the same delicious treats together. For bakers, we sell a cookbook: Allergen-Free Baking: Baked Treats for All Occasions as well as specialized allergen-tested baking ingredients."

Q: How does it feel to have your own business? What have you learned?

A: "I didn’t create this in order to have a business or to work for myself. I actually loved the work I was doing previously as a clinical psychologist. I created this business as a resource to families like my own because it was needed. But, it has been exciting and rewarding. I am learning diverse fields such as web site development, ingredient sourcing and inventory, equipment operation, graphic design, and shipping."

Q: What advice do you have for other mom or dad entrepreneurs?

A: "A new business is all-encompassing. It takes many times more time, money, and energy than I had ever imagined. But if you are at a point in your life when you can totally devote yourself and substantial financial resources to it, and if you cope with obstacles by problem solving (rather than anxiety), and if there is an idea about which you have passion, creating your own company can be wonderfully rewarding."

Q: Do you have plans to expand?

A: "Yes! In fact, we are planning to move into a larger facility this fall so that we have the capacity to distribute our baked treats much more widely. And we are just now introducing a new cookie flavour – organic oatmeal chocolate chip mini cookies."

To find out more about the treats, the raw ingredients or the allergen-free baking cookbook, visit Jill's web site or email info@homefreetreats.com.